David Gaider Posts About Unhealthy Relationships on Twitter, Results Predictable

About a day ago, David Gaider posted what should have been an innocent enough post for any creative type.

Predictably, he’s now being called a rape apologist on Twitter.

Wait–what?

For one, it seems like the folks on Twitter don’t know the difference between an unhealthy relationship and an abusive relationship.  This might explain why they end up in abusive relationships so often. Let me break this down for you: I have an unhealthy relationship with thin mints that arises every Girl Scout cookie season. I don’t have an abusive relationship with thin mints… because thin mints and I have a safe word.

But that’s not even the point. Bioware is the most female-friendly, queer-friendly game developer out there. If you keep alienating people from our own freaking cause, you’re going to end up with no one interested in supporting you.

His tweet is about writing. Unhealthy relationships are excellent writing fodder. Why? Because drama is introduced when things go wrong. Are you going to say that “We need more murders in this book!” means that David Gaider is a serial killer?

NO, DON’T START POSTING THAT DAVID GAIDER IS A SERIAL KILLER.

Also: if you can’t interact with a work of fiction without being “triggered,” the problem lies in you. Get in therapy, for god’s sake. Trigger warnings are a construct of social politeness, not a human right. What a bland world it would be in which we could not dare to discuss anything that might offend or upset anyone at all. Bioware is not obligated to make a world in which nothing unpleasant ever happens just because it could trigger you! The level of sheer selfishness and self-absorption…

But it’s even worse because as I mentioned, it does a disservice to our cause. We should be praising Bioware for having the courage to be friendly to us, not attacking and nit-picking every little thing.

I suspect the reason that Gaider even posted this is because fans are, in fact, going wild over one of the “unhealthy” (not abusive) romances in Dragon Age: Inquisition. It’s likely that they have seen that fire, passion and interest in their fans and are thinking about how they can extend it into future games. It has nothing to do with wanting to trigger abusive thoughts in anyone and it’s absolutely ridiculous that anyone would think so. Their end goal is to entertain. To make people think and feel.

Ironically, the crazed Twitter brigade somehow showed their own misconceptions by bringing Iron Bull’s BDSM-based sexual relationship into the mix… which is probably one of the most healthy, mature, and least potentially abusive relationships in the game. Just going to show that many of these Twitter activists are really just sheltered children at heart.

In fact, the only relationship that even approaches “abusive” is the relationship with Sera, because it is an emotionally abusive relationship for a Dalish elf Inquisitor. Yet no one seems to care about that. (Bioware has noted disdain for the character in their internal notes, but the Internet loves her because breeches.)

Jenna Inouye
JKCI is a tech and gaming writer with a passion for antique crystal doorknobs. She also loves talking about games with other people. Add her on twitter or contact her directly.

Jenna Inouye

JKCI is a tech and gaming writer with a passion for antique crystal doorknobs. She also loves talking about games with other people. Add her on twitter or contact her directly.

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